Sunday, February 25, 2024

Grappling With The Cone Of Smugness – Motorcycle Snob NYC


Simply if you happen to idea New York Town didn’t take its motorbike infrastructure severely, take a look at this child:

It’s a small e-assisted automobile for doing motorbike lane repairs, which is smart, however what doesn’t make sense is that for some explanation why it calls for the operator to put on a helme(n)t:

While completely not one of the different numerous tiny automobiles already in use by means of quite a lot of town companies do:

[From here.]

So is the cause of this that the folks running this factor will likely be uniquely liable to cone assaults? Perhaps:

[Bike lane maintenance crew member locked in hand-to-hand combat with a traffic cone.]

Much more likely regardless that it’s as a result of this factor simply occurs to have pedals, and as smartly all know anything else that has pedals calls for a foam protection hat for some explanation why:

“However wait,” you can be questioning. “Don’t all of them have pedals?” Smartly, sure, all of the different ones have brake pedals and accelerator pedals:

It’s completely nice to pressure the ones forms of automobiles with out dressed in a helmet, clearly. Alternatively, if as an alternative of merely stepping at the pedals you additionally flip them spherical and spherical together with your ft then you wish to have to put on one. It’s easy physics, silly!

And once more, that helmet in particular must be a bicycle helmet, now not an car helmet or a bike helmet that may conceivably be offering exact coverage within the match of a collision:

I don’t know that this proves anything else, I similar to the video.

“So why even trouble equipping this factor with pedals in any respect?,” you can be questioning. “For the reason that town has been the use of shitloads of tiny automobiles for ages, why now not simply use the ones? Can’t we simply ship all of them out in golfing carts and Cushmans?”

Smartly, no, duh! See, this factor goes to be spending a variety of time blockading the motorbike lane:

For my part I haven’t any drawback with the DOT blockading the motorbike lane with a view to attend to it. Alternatively, advocates do, and also you’re now not allowed to dam the motorbike lane in any respect for any explanation why–even to give you contemporary Citi Motorcycles:

That foolish peasant servicing the biggest motorbike proportion fleet in the USA in reality will have to know higher.

Given this, obviously equipping this factor with pedals is the DOT’s try to deflect those proceedings, since it’s going to permit them to respond, “Hiya, it’s a bicycle, it belongs within the motorbike lane.” Alternatively, as I do know from non-public enjoy, you’re now not even allowed to encroach at the motorbike lane when you’re on a real honest-to-Lob two-wheeled human-powered bicycle and serving to somebody else who’s additionally on a bicycle:

This concern of preventing at interested by any explanation why should provide an explanation for why I’m the one bicyclist in New York Town who ever yields to pedestrians.

So in reality, the one street repairs automobile that might be able to fulfill the smugerati can be some type of building drone that hovers over the motorbike lane with a view to repair it:

Despite the fact that even then it could run afoul of the livable streets motion, since banning helicopters is the brand new banning automobiles:

This then brings us again to the issue of what they will have to identify this factor:

Turns out like “Damned If You Do, Damned If You Don’t” can be becoming.


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